1. |
Prologue
02:32
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Everything is fucked
Everything is fucked and
When you wake up in the morning
you know it too be true
Everything is fucked
Everything is fucked from
Your dad, mom, sister, brother
Husband, wife, or lover
Everything is fucked
Everything is fucked
Get up out of bed
If you have the strength
the world’s turning against you
Or maybe it’s just your brain
Hey, how's it going? Welcome to the album, I hope you enjoy it.
Not enough bands introduce their albums
Could you imagine if the Beatles were like
"We're Sgt. Peppers and we hope you enjoy the show"
Oh wait anyway these songs are all about a bunch of different things but you might notice a thematic resonance. Did the Beatles ever do that? Oh yeah Sgt peppers.
You know what maybe just go listen to Sgt peppers. It's probably a better album.
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2. |
Dinosaurs Are Dicks
03:27
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Dinosaurs, dinosaurs are dicks
they fucked up by turing into fossil fuel years ago
now they are stupid bodies that work to pollute the earth
dinosaurs dinosaurs are dicks
now let me take you let me take you to a quiet day in 1963
It’s a bright day in dallas with a lovely parade to see
but all of a sudden there is a shock when our president goes limp in Jackie’s arms
no one checked no one checked the grassy knoll for a pacycehlpalasaur
dinosaurs killed JFK it’s true they don’t want you to know
dinosaurs are responsible for everything bad in the world
dinosaurs are the reason I can’t make out with girls
dinosaurs gave me measles when I was just the age of three
they filled my vaccine with sugar water and saline
And for the final travesty let’s go to September 2001
here’s where I’ll tell you the truth of what happened that day
Everyone believes that Al Queda was responsible for the 9/11 attacks, that’s what your government would have you believe
and they’re actually completely right, but several ankylosaurs were on the plan that day, and lost thier lives
never forget never forget,
america lost its innocence that day
even dinosaurs stopped being dicks to focus on our true enemies
Invade Iraq and stop gay marriage that's the message of this song
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3. |
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I’ve conquered the all the Earth with an iron fist
You can try and stop me but I’ve got a list
Of cool kicks and punches to do
I taught my army them as our victories accrue
I’m the planet dictator and I’ll take you to school
You’ll learn the godly worship of me is your new rule
Get out of here Ra I’m the only sun you need
When I am everything you want you will never be free
Get down baby work the labor camps
I hope you work hard to show me your thanks
Get down baby work the labor camps
I hope you work hard to show me your thanks
He’s our all-knowing leader
He keeps us all in fear
From his volcano lair
He’s got a Poly Sci degree
He knows how to oversee
To keep us from laissez faire
Ok I guess it seems austerity isn’t working
I need to jumpstart our country with government spending
Don’t worry I’ll always be an overload that’s cruel
But I’m signing subsidies for technical school
But now I need to handle crumbling infrastructure
A society without roads can’t really function
I could use slave labor but that doesn’t seem
A good way to stimulate the economy
Get down baby I’ve installed a new tax
On carbon emissions for our polar ice caps
Get down baby I’ve installed a new tax
On carbon emissions for our polar ice caps
He’s our all-knowing leader
He keeps us all in fear
But he cares about the environment
He works us all to death
We all just want some rest
And to stop cap and trade requirements
Please continue with your mining activities
Our leader needs more coal for his turbo massage chair
Also those in the south quadrant begin mining for beats
Our leader will be engaged in a rap battle with the rebel leader Kendrick Lamar
now I’m thinking of the women who want to have it all
To work in the mines and raise a family
That’s why at the start of the new fiscal year
I’m implementing paid maternity leave
I’m noticing my workers getting sick with the black lung
Somehow constant mining has put disease in the air
And since I can’t silence them all by cutting out thier tongues
I’m adding government backed universal healthcare
I’m your leader, your leader
Your leader in it all
I’m gonna rule forever when everyone else falls
I’m your leader, your leader
Your leader in it all
I’m gonna rule forever when everyone else fall
Actually now, I think about it the best way to go
Is to hold democratic elections because everyone knows
The best societies are where people are free
So I’m stepping down and I’m gonna flee
Does anyone know a planet where they don’t extradite?
I gotta get out get out overnight
I gotta run run run real quick
The firing squad’s coming for me I can hear the guns click
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4. |
End Times
03:49
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The Apocalypse is nye
Now we are to die
Wake up and be reborn
You inhabit the dragon’s form
Here now the horsemen four do arrive
Death, Disease, and War and saline bottles to help you cry
Throw a bible into the lake
Sing with me now your soul’s to take
I hope you like taking your baths in molten lava
It’s great for your pores but not so much your organs
The Garden of Earthly Delights has left you to the right
The Prince of Hell is eating and will shit you out tonight
Hellfire is rising crazy and covering the Earth
Your Japanese tea garden is now covered in dirt
Aristocrats can’t shelter in thier bourgeois cage
they’ll lose thier heads real quick when the estate tax is raised
Now you might think “Hey I’m an atheist,
The laws of immortal gods don’t apply to me”
But that’s where you’re wrong you shouldn’t have fought
To get the Ten Commandments out of government
The Apocalypse is nye
Now we are to die
Wake up and be reborn
You inhabit the dragon’s form
The blood moon is here
The wolves will howl in fear
The blood moon is here
The wolves will howl in fear
Hey there Mr Anti-Christ let’s hang out today
You have some gross pimples that scared the other kids away
No big your busy, I totally get it
Taking over out planet carries a lot of jobs with it
I’m starting to think you’ve been avoiding me
Like you’ve gotten tired of my comedy
You have to admit I always make everyone cackle
When I talk about your mom getting boned by a jackel
But that’s cool I’ll ave a stay at home night
Maybe drink a glass of wine and watch some Netflix alright?
And when I’m drunk I’ll give evil Jesus a call
and he’ll yell at me and begin to layout all of my flaws
He’ll say
Your friends have put up with your shit for way too long
Your friends have been chosen by the almighty dog
Your friends don’t want to hang out with you
You’re condemned to be alone and watch Bill and Ted 2
The Apocalypse is nye
Now we are to die
Wake up and be reborn
You inhabit the dragon’s form
The Apocalypse is nye
The Apocalypse is nye
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5. |
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6. |
Swamp Monster's Serenade
02:53
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If you’ve been feeling your life’s in too much malaise
I’m right there with you in a daily muddy haze
I know that you might want somebody who feels this too
I’ll be the one to be with you
I promise you’ll get over the odors that I make
My slimy skin will grown on you once you enter my lake
If you’re cool with living in the noxious, toxic, fumes
I’ll be the one to be with you
If you ask me to
If you ask me to
I can make you a cool display of rose
I’m botanokinetic
I can’t speak much for the values that you seek
I terrorize highschoolers once or twice a week
If you want to build a mud hut in my dark lagoon
I’ll be the one to be with you
I must admit I don’t have much for internet
Dial-up plugged into a tree is the best you’ll get
But we can watch squirrels get into bloody fights
It’ll be a great Friday night
Do you like frog legs?
I eat a lot of frog legs
They’re pretty good they taste like chicken
I don’t actually know that I have no taste buds
If you wanted to connect with the person I thought I’d be
He’s trapped in the bog living subconsciously
But if the thing I am is something worth your view
I’ll be the one to be with you
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7. |
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What if it's not so bad?
Maybe things will work out, work out, work out
Cynics can hold but what it they're wrong?
It's all downhill once we're gone
It'll be OK
It'll be alright
We can't do much better so let's not fight
We'll run away we'll find our path
We'll never worry, 'cause we'll never last
We'll jump through hurdles and dodge the traps
We have to move before our dye is cast
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8. |
Epilogue (Ruby)
04:04
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Ruby you’ve got your diamond slippers
Headstrong and alone down to your DNA
Ruby you’ll find that there’s some meaning
In between the extremes that the people will say
Like hercules you are half goddess
But unfortunately the other half you’ll see
All I want for you is not to squander
Everything that is made, everything is perfect
And when I want you to follow don’t
Just find your own way
find your own way
And when I want you to follow don’t
Just find your own way
find your own way from me
The ocean’s expanding and collapsing
It’s on you Ruby to fulfill all you dreams
I don’t want to obligate you further
But hopefully you won’t hate me quite enough
I want you to share in all of our unconscious
I want you to know that I won’t always be there
But you won’t need me for much longer
Once you’re here Ruby the world’s for you to see
And when I want you to follow don’t
Just find your own way
find your own way
And when I want you to follow don’t
Just find your own way
find your own way
Ruby I don’t want to say it’s over
But at this point I’m more entropy than man
All what Iife’s worth what’s ever knowing
Doesn’t exist but you are close enough
And when I want you to follow don’t
Just find your own way
find your own way
And when I want you to follow don’t
Just find your own way
find your own way from me
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Naughty Triceratops Rock Island, Illinois
Going for that hardcore life no matter the cost.
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